Saturday, May 9, 2009


Through some strange electronic pathway, Fiorella has received a note obviously intended for someone else. She's posting it right now, hoping someone will recognize the people involved so she can forward the message appropriately:

Dear Bristol,

Thanks for steppin' up to the plate for the ol' hockey mom and becomin' a spokeswoman for sexual abstinence. There are, though, a few things that I'd like you to keep in mind.

First, if any of those pesky reporters brings up somethin' you said a couple of months ago that contradicts what you're sayin' now, just tell'im you were taken out of context.

Next, you can go a long way on a wink and a grin, but now that you're keepin' your clothes on, it wouldn't hurt to update the wardrobe--bill it to those people sponsorin' you. That's what Mama did.

Finally, a lot depends on your born-again virginhood. Think White House. Think a nanny for Tripp so you can hang with your friends instead of changing diapers.

Think all those handsome, hunky male interns.

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