Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Even Worser

Lynn Johnston ended the comic strip For Better or for Worse with Elizabeth Patterson marrying her high school sweetheart, Anthony, which I thought was something of a cop-out, despite the realism of him being divorced with a child. But I know how to fix that.

I suggest killing off Anthony in a horrible automobile accident half-caused by Elizabeth's negligence so that, with stepdaughter in tow, she flees back to the North (remember, For Better or for Worse is a Canadian strip) to ponder her conscience while teaching in a First Nation schoolhouse again. Then she'll fall in love with the Territory doctor and, after a tortured courtship, they will marry. But he will fall through the ice trying to come to her side for the birth of their first child, and she, widowed again, but with two children now, will flee back to Toronto (or wherever it is her family lives) to ponder again.

Then she'll run into her old beau, Warren, whom she will get pregnant by, then marry, then lose when he crashes his helicopter into a mountain somewhere. So she flees to the North again, now with three children to care for.

Eventually she'll be a single mother living in a shoe with so many children she doesn't know what to do.

Hey, I'm good at this! Maybe I should approach a syndicate with my own comic strip.

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