Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Don't Waste Your Time

Fiorella is putting on her bitchy cap to review The Village, which is totally lame. Not that she saw much of it. Husband had it tuned in for only half an hour before Fio asked him to turn it off.

The movie was so bad that it was embarrassing. The actors didn't so much speak as declaim, unless they were being flint-faced and portentous. At first, Fio wondered if the film was some sort of pseudo-Shakespeare dealie, what with the women wearing long dresses in FLDS pastels and none of the characters using contractions when they spoke. Then she wondered if the village atmosphere was leading up to a Shirley Jackson lottery. Everyone acted so unnatural, as if they were being...uh...filmed

Curious, Fio consulted Google for the plot and learned the whole set-up was a rip-off, that the village had been established in 1970 as a retreat from the world where a small group of suffering people could have new lives and raise their families safe from harm. Safe from modern health care too, as it turned out, which was the crux of the plot because when someone (another of the crop of currently stylish wonder women) broke through to 2010, the gig was up.

It wouldn't have lasted anyway. No group that small can be self-sufficient, and the gene pool would have been totally inbred in another generation.

What a loser. And a pretentious one at that.

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