So, Matt and Amy are separating at last. The senior Roloffs, who first introduced the viewing public to dwarfs as people rather than oddities, have long been lining their coffers with profit as they battled it out with each other on the small screen. Amy may be grumpy, but Matt is a megalomaniac.
The story goes that Matt proposed the separation, saying he had never felt comfortable in his own home, although Fiorella can't figure out why--he totally dominated it. Sure, he provided his wife and family with fame, loads of loot, and a great house, but he also ran rough-shod over them.
Fiorella prefers Will and Jen, the little couple. Check them out this Tuesday evening at 9:00.
Showing posts with label Roloff. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Roloff. Show all posts
Sunday, March 16, 2014
Saturday, March 23, 2013
Dwarf News (Revised)
Fiorella forgot to mention that she caught up with the Roloffs the other night. Amy and Zack were on an expedition to climb Mt. St. Helens while Matt was having a little red schoolhouse built for the Western town display at the Roloff farm. Jacob only appeared briefly, and Jeremy and Molly were nowhere to be seen.
Too bad. Matt, Amy, and Zachary (who practically ran up the mountain), were not enough to carry a one-hour show. Fiorella understands that climbing a mountain is tough, especially for a fifty-year-old female dwarf, but grunting gets boring after a while, and switching back and forth between the mountain climb and the construction of the schoolhouse didn't relieve the tedium. There was no real conflict--we knew Amy would reach the top, and we knew the schoolhouse would get built in time. In romance writer speak, the show had a sagging middle.
Especially dreary was Matt's constant prattle about how he was trying to please his wife with a surprise. Number one, he's used that line before to justify whatever he wants to do. Number two, it sounded like he was trying to soften the egomaniac image we all have of him. Amy also tried to polish up the family, casually mentioning that she has three kids in college now. Since Molly always took the academic high road, that must mean that Jeremy and Zack have finally gotten their heads together. Fio is happy for them, but she would have preferred a show with the old drama.
On to other dwarf news, Friend Paula told Fio that she's read that Jen and Bill have adopted a dwarf baby, just as Fio hoped. No sagging middle there.
Note to readers to rise early: This blog has been revised from an earlier version that was, unfortunately, edited last night when Fiorella's brain was fried.
Too bad. Matt, Amy, and Zachary (who practically ran up the mountain), were not enough to carry a one-hour show. Fiorella understands that climbing a mountain is tough, especially for a fifty-year-old female dwarf, but grunting gets boring after a while, and switching back and forth between the mountain climb and the construction of the schoolhouse didn't relieve the tedium. There was no real conflict--we knew Amy would reach the top, and we knew the schoolhouse would get built in time. In romance writer speak, the show had a sagging middle.
Especially dreary was Matt's constant prattle about how he was trying to please his wife with a surprise. Number one, he's used that line before to justify whatever he wants to do. Number two, it sounded like he was trying to soften the egomaniac image we all have of him. Amy also tried to polish up the family, casually mentioning that she has three kids in college now. Since Molly always took the academic high road, that must mean that Jeremy and Zack have finally gotten their heads together. Fio is happy for them, but she would have preferred a show with the old drama.
On to other dwarf news, Friend Paula told Fio that she's read that Jen and Bill have adopted a dwarf baby, just as Fio hoped. No sagging middle there.
Note to readers to rise early: This blog has been revised from an earlier version that was, unfortunately, edited last night when Fiorella's brain was fried.
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
Farewell
Farewell Matt and Amy. Fiorella will miss the gorgeous photography, the LPA conventions, Jeremy's girlfriends, Zach's soccer games, Molly's good sense, and Jacob's . . . well, Jacob.
She won't miss Matt's ever-increasing megalomania. In the final episode, he railed at the family for not taking care of the house and farm the way he thought they should. Yes, after building a monument to his own glory, Matt wants everyone else to maintain it. But what else did we expect from Matt Roloff? Remember when he set up the international dwarf soccer team in his name, and then, the second his foot hit European soil, scooted off for a fun tour with Jeremy, leaving Amy to pick up the pieces?
The hook for the last episode was that the Roloffs might sell the farm. Actually, Matt was using the threat to manipulate Amy and the kids into take over more responsibility for the monster he's created. It worked, supposedly, because at the end of the episode, Zach and Jer pledged to help more, in addition to their college classes and part-time jobs.
However Fio couldn't help but wonder about Molly and Jacob. Amy kept talking about "the boys" growing up and leaving home, as if the twins are the only kids in the family. Did she and Matt even consider their two youngest when they were prancing around to various mansions they might buy if they sold the farm? Did they really want to uproot Molly and Jacob from their home and school? Fio thinks M and J need to grow up on the farm like their older brothers did. Especially Jacob, the forgotten child who longs so desperately for his brothers' attention, his father's approval, and his mother's notice. Thank goodness Molly is there for him.
As a final note, Fiorella has some advice for Matt. First, see a shrink and get some pills. You're going around the bend. So what if Amy's car splattered oil on the driveway? That happens to driveways all the time--that's what they're there for.
Second, don't expect Jeremy and Zach to follow in your footsteps. Just because you were independent at age twenty doesn't mean they will be. They're in college, which you weren't.
Third, hire a staff. Not just a flunky to do the footwork on your projects, but a couple of maids and a gardener. Don't expect your children to act as your servants.
And a note to Amy: don't get so involved in saving the world that you forget about your two kids still at home.
She won't miss Matt's ever-increasing megalomania. In the final episode, he railed at the family for not taking care of the house and farm the way he thought they should. Yes, after building a monument to his own glory, Matt wants everyone else to maintain it. But what else did we expect from Matt Roloff? Remember when he set up the international dwarf soccer team in his name, and then, the second his foot hit European soil, scooted off for a fun tour with Jeremy, leaving Amy to pick up the pieces?
The hook for the last episode was that the Roloffs might sell the farm. Actually, Matt was using the threat to manipulate Amy and the kids into take over more responsibility for the monster he's created. It worked, supposedly, because at the end of the episode, Zach and Jer pledged to help more, in addition to their college classes and part-time jobs.
However Fio couldn't help but wonder about Molly and Jacob. Amy kept talking about "the boys" growing up and leaving home, as if the twins are the only kids in the family. Did she and Matt even consider their two youngest when they were prancing around to various mansions they might buy if they sold the farm? Did they really want to uproot Molly and Jacob from their home and school? Fio thinks M and J need to grow up on the farm like their older brothers did. Especially Jacob, the forgotten child who longs so desperately for his brothers' attention, his father's approval, and his mother's notice. Thank goodness Molly is there for him.
As a final note, Fiorella has some advice for Matt. First, see a shrink and get some pills. You're going around the bend. So what if Amy's car splattered oil on the driveway? That happens to driveways all the time--that's what they're there for.
Second, don't expect Jeremy and Zach to follow in your footsteps. Just because you were independent at age twenty doesn't mean they will be. They're in college, which you weren't.
Third, hire a staff. Not just a flunky to do the footwork on your projects, but a couple of maids and a gardener. Don't expect your children to act as your servants.
And a note to Amy: don't get so involved in saving the world that you forget about your two kids still at home.
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